Saturday, February 11, 2006
Went on a commando mission today... not just wearing pants without undies (although that may or may not have also applied)... I mean real commando.
But first the background...
My friend Kenyan/Gujrati friend Nikhil goes to a disco a few months ago on a Saturday night. There he meets single, attractive, 2nd/3rd generation Indian girl Nadiya. They hit off. Have a few drinks. Go to his house for... coffee. Next morning.. she's still there... so they have breakfast... which turns into lunch then more drinks, dinner and more... coffee. Following Monday, Tuesday we see Nikhil walking looking really pleased. Positvely glowing. Thursday... he just looks like somebody tried to teach him Hebrew....
"Guys. She hasn't left my house since Saturday. I don't get it. I mean... I hardly know her... I thought we were just having fun. But she isn't leaving. She didn't have clothes to wear, so she was wearing mine. Yesterday, she actually went somewhere and I thought I had rid of her. But she came back before dinner with a bag full of clothes. I don;t know what's going on."
Then things got really interesting.....
Nikhil, is fairly attractive and decently well off. Which is why he doesn't live on campus but rents out a house with a friend. So it's easier for him to have lady friends over once in a while. That's what a bachelor pad is for after all. But this female was just moving in.... no need to ask him... no need to date or anything... they spend one night together and she never leaves. This has got to be really weird. In the beginning Nikhil doesn't even really notice. It's just like she is there a lot of the time. He goes home, she's there. He leaves in the mornign she's there. And all that... coffee had clouded his perception.
But things became serious when she started moving her own stuff in... a toothbrush... a soft toy...a pillow... makeup....Everyday Nikhil would go home and find some new belonging of her in his house.
Then his flatmate dropped the bomb. He wasn't willing to share the place with 3 people especially when only 2 people paid the rent and did all the work. So he just packed and moved out. And that was just perfect for Nadiya. Next day she moves into his room, and fills it with ehr stuff. Including an exercise bike!
Now things are getting out of hand. Nikhil is paying twice the rent, and twice everything. She never peels off a bill.
So he does the brave and honourable thing. He breaks up with her. Only problem is.. he can't... she just won't let him. He tries in every way possible to tell her that it's over... but she still jsut doesn't go anywhere... standard line is "Oh come on... don't be silly... we'll work on it...you want coffee"
By now it's exam time. So Nikhil can't be bothered with this anymore. He just tries to concentrate and pass. Spends like 16 hours a day at the library because he is afraid to go back home. After the exams, he just packs up and leaves for Kenya, hoping the three months break from her will just sort things out automatically.
Except.. it doesn't. Now Tom and I and a couple of his friends did what most honourable friends would do. We stalked his vampiric girlfriend. Apparently, she has had a major fallout with her parents. So they don't want her in the house unless she lives by their rules. She barely passed high school. She said she was in another uni doign bachelors... infact she was just doing some part time vocational thing. She had no money or job to speak off except maybe this and that. She had been living with friends who had already kicked her out. She had lived with an Aussie guy who had dumped her fast.
Then one day... we get the shock of our lives.... she is STILL living in Nikhil's house.... STILL!!! even though Nikhil wasn't there. Somehow she had his keys. And she would just sneak in, keep the blinds closed and do god knows what.
So we tell Nikhil and he was shocked. And asked her to fix it. Do whatever it takes... whatever it takes. And he mailed us his spare keys.
So we did. Today. A week before Nikhil is due back. We got somebody to keep an eye on the house and her for a few days. She has apparently gone out of town or something for the weekend. So we got in. And in two hours falt we packed everything she owned into boxes. I persoanlly lugged that stupid bike out. We loaded it onthe back of Tom's uncles truck and drove it over to her parents house. Somebody kept an eye on them so that we showed up the moment they were out at the shops. So we dumped the whole load of crap on their doorstep. Scrawled a note saying "Nadiya's stuff. She will pick it up." and just left. Then we got a locksmith and had the locks changed on the doors and windows. Upgraded to a monitored burglar alarm with a different code. Now she should try getting in. Nikhil lands Friday. As soon as he does, we have got another girl, a friend of ours, who will pretend to be madly in love with him. They will be seen together everywhere (not difficult because she goes everywhere with us anyway). Infact she is going to move in and be his flatmate for a while as they pretend to be living together. And we keep up this charade and ignore her, until it blows over. Hopefully.
Are we the BESTEST friends in the world or what?
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7:44 AM
